Birthday baby

Two years ago the clock flipped over to 12:00am on June the 2nd while Curtis and I were laying in bed watching anime, and just like that my four days worth of prodromal labour shifted with a single, strange contraction.
“Did you seriously just go into labour?” Curtis joked, remarking on our oft-discussed prediction that I’d have baby Fuzz on June the 2nd. While it took another two hours of irregular, cramps and mild anxiety attacks for me to finally work the guts to ask my midwife to come over and double-check. When she arrived and checked me, she said that while I wasn’t yet in labour, I was sitting at 7-8cm dilated with signs of pre-labour, so she was going to have to stick around just in case the baby fell out the next time I sneezed. Naturally, the real contractions started immediately following that check, and I went straight into transition.
It was the most painful, emotional and difficult labour I’ve ever experienced… and it was also the fastest. Zephyra was born about two hours later in the tub in my living room. She was helped into the world with the support of my amazing friend and doula, my husband and love of my life, my two incredibly loving midwives (who later admitted that they didn’t have any medical reason to be there at the same time, but had wanted to both be present to support me), my friend and birth photographer, and my two children who fought to wake up in time to witness their new sibling’s birth. Xan stood naked next to the tub and cheered and Tempest climbed up on top of Curtis’ back while he held me up so she could get a good view of the new little person.

We had a party that evening and so many friends and family came by, bringing food and wine and smiles. It was totally amazing. After so much fear and so much pain through such a difficult pregnancy, her birth and the day’s events were a really beautiful close to chapter of my life spent growing babies.

I’m so glad I have photos of her birth. I’m so glad I have some video, even if most of it is dark and grainy. I’m so glad I have some really lovely portraits from another photographer friend from her first few days (so that the onus wasn’t on me to try and get it done during my baby moon). These images are so cherished, and it means that whenever I’m feeling wistful – as I am tonight as the clock turns over to June 3rd and we pass her second birthday – I can go through it all over again and remember how awesome birth is. It’s painful, and intense, and powerful and emotional and absolutely stunningly beautiful.

My last baby is not a baby anymore… and with the end of this day it means there will no longer be any babies in our home. It is a bittersweet feeling.

Happy second birthday, Boo.



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