I have a problem.  We don’t want to have another child right away, and we don’t want to abstain.  With a relationship at the point where ours is right now, physical intimacy is wanted, and needed to help us recapture some feelings. 

Natural family planning works best when you have 3 solid hours of sleep before waking up at the exact time every morning, which is impossible with a high-needs baby with insomnia.  It’s also unreliable when exclusively breastfeeding.

The period I thought I had was not one, it was just a return of postpartum bleeding.  So far, I have not had my fertility return but I’m paranoid because in no way do I want to be one of those people who is constantly pregnant.

I’m allergic to laytex, so I cannot use laytex condoms, a diaphram, a female condom, a cervical cap, or the birth control patch (for sake of the adhesive).  Most of these are used in combination with spermicide cream…

I’m allergic to spermicide, and nonoxynol-9 so I cannot use the sponge, spermicide cream, foam or non-laytex condoms which are lubricated in it.

I’m allergic to most commercial lubricants, which takes away my option of polyurethane condoms, and as far as I know, lambskin.  Not to mention the cost.  Not that we have sex often enough to ring up hundreds a month, but it’s still daunting.

I cannot take a combination pill when breastfeeding (or any implant, lunelle, depo provera, or the ring),  in the past I have not reacted well to it and was advised to go off it.  Both my mother and I have strong reactions to estrogen.

I have moral objections to the progesterone-only pill (mini-pill) which is the only safe pill to take while breastfeeding.  I’m also not sure of my reactions to that, as I’ve never taken it before on it’s own.  If it was truly my only option, I may try to reconsider.

I am not at all comfortable with an IUD, especially having known quite a few people who were permanently damaged by one, including my mother.

What do I do?

— Babs



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