34 weeks and I’ve definitely dropped. My belly looks almost the same size as it was 4 weeks ago, but the shape has completely changed.

It’s easier to tell when you compare directly from my last photos.

Seriously, look at that shit. Is that not the most dramatic drop you’ve ever seen? What the hell. After carrying so high for so much of the pregnancy, now I’m lower than I was at this point with all the others.

I literally got up out of bed a few days ago, caught my reflection in the mirror and said, “Holy shit, I think the baby dropped!”. I had no idea it could happen that fast. I didn’t expect her to drop until the very end, seeing as she’s my fourth and all. I can breathe a little easier now, but unfortunately no less RAGING HORRIFIC HEARTBURN. The heartburn triggers my nausea, which triggers more heartburn, repeat ad nauseum… literally.
This anecdote counts as an Adventures in Hyperemesis: This afternoon I lay down (slightly propped) due to bad nausea and heartburn and woke up very suddenly 2.5 hours later when I had vomited in my sleep and aspirated it. That has never, ever happened to me before. Never in my life. Thankfully it didn’t… you know, get anywhere. I checked. Unfortunately it meant that every time I coughed or cleared my throat (which I was doing for hours due to the discomfort and pain in my lungs) shit comes out and I taste puke. So fucking gross. So fucking, fucking, fucking gross. I feel like the most unsanitary, disgusting turd right now. Ugghhhhhhkkkk.

On to less disgusting subjects.

I’m having a proper maternity session with a photographer friend that will likely happen this weekend, and I’m really looking forward to it. With serendipitous timing, I finally received this makeup colour palette I ordered when it was on sale some time back – so naturally I’ve been dying to experiment with it and this gave me a perfect excuse. I need to make sure I have the right makeup look for the shoot, right? So I totally needed to spend two hours playing around with my new colours and finding something that looked good and would photograph well. It’s an investment, you see. This is important. Research and all. Oh, I could spend thousands of dollars on fun makeup if I had that kind of cash to throw around…
But I digress.

The kids helped me set up my lighting rig, and once I had everything worked out and took my usual fare of belly shot I decided I’d try to have a bit more fun with it in effort to tone down the morose feelings I have about my belly this week.

It makes me ridiculously uncomfortable to try and pose myself and actually take real maternity portraits; no matter what I do I feel like I look moronic. I don’t like smiling, or looking at the camera, but when I don’t I it looks really “posey” like I’m trying (and failing) to be sexy-with-a-‘th’ even though that’s completely NOT what I’m doing. Uggh.
This is exactly why I don’t ever do this shit. I can take pictures of my kids, of Curtis, of friends and relatives and ridiculously shy strangers and get everyone out of their shell… except me. Curtis can try, but I never lose sight of the fact that I have to edit these images later and that’s just double awkward.
I had Curtis come and help me get through some of my own shyness, and help by providing inspiration and a little fun to get through the worst of it.

I’m trying to like these, and I really want to like them, but it is ridiculously hard to not feel that they – like 99% of the pictures I ever see of myself – are embarrassing. I’m also convinced that my very angular/square jawline coupled with a cleft chin totally makes me look like a man in drag. A heavily pregnant man in drag. Or maybe Michael Jackson. With epic tits.

I was going to happily delete them all once I loaded them into Lightroom and stared at the grid for a while, but I’m trying really, really hard to not break my promise to stop ripping up or deleting all the pictures of my face that ever come by. I’ve been actively trying and take more pictures of myself, share them and be okay with that… which is a lot harder than it seems. Pregnancy provides me with the opportunity and motivation to take more images because I want to document my growing and changing body, but it doesn’t take away my desire for self-sabotoge. Regardless of all that bullshit I’m posting them anyway, because there is a little part of me that kind of likes them and I want to nurture that.



First a standard portrait; though I actually took this several hours after the belly photos while testing the light in the bedroom without my equipment set up.

This is the first time I’ve been pregnant and not had my face get chubby around the cheeks and jaw. I suppose hyperemesis will do that… I’m pretty sure my belly is smaller this time around as well, probably for the same reasons.

I haven’t weighed myself this pregnancy, but I know I’ve gained very little weight because I can still get my pre-pregnancy pants up without any effort and generally it takes about 15lbs before I outgrow them. I’m nervous that once my 2-3 week postpartum recovery period is over, I may weigh less than I did before pregnancy; as much as I’d love to see that as a really, really good thing it’s pretty unhealthy to lose that kind of weight after childbirth when you’re breastfeeding a newborn full time. At least the nausea will be gone then, so I can work on gaining some of the weight back without too much of a challenge.

Anyway, photos…

Curtis loves this one because he always finds this hilarious: sucking in my stomach as far as I can to try and see my tattoo. It didn’t work, I couldn’t see it.

I really wish my hand wasn’t cut off in this one.

I didn’t intentionally make these naked-er as I went, it just sort of happened that way.

Comments

comments

99 Comments

  • araeil says:

    So, I was scrolling though Instagram tonight looking at belly pictures. Because I have the baby rabies. Anyways, BAM. There’s your belly. On an account where some dude just posts pictures of pregnant bellies. Its the last colour photo in this post, in case you’re wondering which one. You can’t see your face, just your smile, which is how I knew. So yeah. Not sure how you feel about people randomly sharing your photo?

  • random comment from a random reader:

    your little girl looks like she could be in an american apparel ad in the last photo of the series with your son where she’s pulling his/her shirt. it’s the colors and the pose haha

    and lovely photos of you!

  • bluealoe says:

    The first thing I noticed in all these pictures was your hair. It’s definitely lighter than last time I saw pictures of you. πŸ™‚ It was a little jarring at first, but I think it suits you.

    The second thing I noticed was how *happy* you look. You seriously just BEAM with happiness. Which is kind of strange, knowing how hard this pregnancy has been, but who am I to argue with the pictures? πŸ˜‰

    I totally don’t even see the square jawline you’re talking about. Am I just blind?

    I’m really impressed you were able to post pictures of yourself, because I’m still at a stange where I want to burn all pictures of myself and will only share if forced to. So yeah, I get where you’re coming from, and good job for actually posting!

    I like the last one the best, because when I look at it I get this sense of strength and vulnerability and fear and confidence all at the same time. If that makes any sense.

    • admin says:

      Yes you are blind! I have the most angular face, it’s like someone chiseled it.

      And also THANK YOU for understanding the pictures thing. Several people have seemed to think I’m fishing for compliments, and I do understand that it may look that way to others who haven’t experienced the same thing, but to me it’s been a sort of personal challenge to try and be a little bit more gentle with myself. I’m actually feeling okay about the way I look right now… and that’s HUGE for me. Really, really huge. I know it won’t last, but while it does I want to push myself a little beyond my comfort zones and try and tear that self-conscious band-aid off, you know? A blog is an easy, quick way of sharing myself and trying to actively *be okay* with others seeing me… which is a huge, huge challenge sometimes.

      • manic_geisha says:

        I hide behind the camera.

        I realized that I have no photos of myself with my new daughter that I would show anyone. It was an amazing act of will to not delete the few I do have.

        I keep trying to tell myself…its because I take all the pictures! It is and it isn’t.

      • bluealoe says:

        I’ve always been bad at describing facial features. People will say things like “She has high cheekbones” and my response is “Really? Huh.” But even so, I’m looking at your user icon right now and your chin looks curved, not angular at all.

        I definitely understand about sharing pictures. It’s not about wanting compliments, it’s about trying to feel okay about your looks and overcome being self-conscious about it.

  • manic_geisha says:

    I can’t believe how big your eldest has become! Enormous. I think the last time I stopped by your blog she was saying cute jumbled up things and your husband was in cooks training(?).

    Asked my chef husband if he knew of any jobs. He said Pescatores, which I’m not sure if I would recommend as being a great place to work.

    Also your chin is supremely feminine. Gorgeous pics!

    • admin says:

      Thank you! Curtis is going to try down there, too. I’ve heard mixed things about them, we’ve never actually eaten there before!

      • manic_geisha says:

        Apparently its quite good food. I’ve never eaten their either. As a true Vancouver Island native, I ate so much seafood as a kid I could not eat another bite. My grandma said I am indian so I should like it.

        I guess I do have an insider tip. The Victoria Golf Club will be hiring soon-ish. Like in the next month or two. Which I imagine isn’t immediate enough. But I’m guessing they will be hiring for the days.

        When my husband worked at Pescatores, he wouldn’t get home until well after midnight. Not the best for family life…

  • Anonymous says:

    it’s alia (maylea_moon)

    you are absolutely stunning. my 6.5 year old asked me if you’re having 2 babies ;P you’ve definitely dropped.

    i haven’t been following lj for awhile but i know you’re having a girl, does she have a name yet? and on a TOTALLY unrelated subject, what is your natural hair color and how did you get it how it is now? professional? box?

    love, alia

  • effervescent says:

    This is random, but I’m watching it and it made me think of you – have you seen ‘The Business of Being Born’? It’s an interesting documentary about birth and how it’s handled in the US (and Canada as well, I think).

  • allenjaphy says:

    One of my three year old daughters asks to see your baby belly pictures. I’ve told her there is a baby girl in you safe and warm and getting chubby. She asked about your tattoo and I explained that sometimes in life important things can be invisible to others, but we are changed, so sometimes people put reminders on their body to say that this is different, and safe, and I need to remember, and I need others to see, and I need it not to be invisible. I have a tattoo on each wrist, one says “Either/Or” and the other says “I grew up/I didn’t know” I needed to be reminded everytime I touch anything of what those mean to me. I think my daughter got it.

  • Anonymous says:

    Please don’t delete your photos!

    Have you seen myparentswereawesome? Your kids will LOVE to look at pictures of you, so young, so healthy, so beautiful. (Won’t anyone think of the children?) Also, in the ones where you’re smiling, I totally see Tempest. When she’s older, I hope she sees herself too (because the pictures have not been deleted). So my point is, in case you missed it, please don’t delete your photos.

    One time, my Mom asked to have a photo deleted, but my Dad said “No, that’s how you look.” My Mom was insulted, until my Dad said “Hey, in my head, I’m still 20 years old, when I look at pictures I wonder who is that old man who’s holding my grandson!” And that changed the way we look at pictures of ourselves.

  • robynz says:

    Lady, you are amazing! I just hold my face in my hands with astonishment every time you say you’re not happy with your appearance/photographs. You are jaw-droppingly dead fucken sexy. I originally started following you, six or so years back, when I met you in a girlparts community on LJ. I have always thought you were so beautiful!

    Just had to say it, whether or not it’s creepy or unlikely, because I’m a devoted fangirl, haha…

    Okay, yeah, that got creepy. ♥

  • tmuses says:

    Number 6 is my favorite. It’s like a superhero. I like how the light looks like it’s shining through your crotch. Your super power is sex and birth!! All stemming from the same place.

    The one above it shows off how huge your belly. I have no pictures like this at all. I was 18/19 when I was pregnant. No good camera or photographers I knew and really I had no desire to do this. Even now I don’t think I would. I guess it just isn’t me, even if they are beautiful and a great way to remember.

    • admin says:

      A similar comment on the light has been made by half a dozen people now, and it seriously has me LMAO every time I look at the image now.

      It was always important to me to have pictures of my pregnancy. Even back when I was a high schooler my friends and I used to promise each other that we’d have all these cool pictures of ourselves when we got older and pregnant. One particular friend and I had this crazy obsession with maternity portraits and baby portraits.
      I remember finding one (Just ONE!) that my father took of my mom when she was 8.5 months pregnant with me, and she’s naked and has a little smile, and I thought it was the most beautiful thing I’d ever seen. I was convinced then and there that I needed to document any and all pregnancies I had, even if I felt like shit at the time.

  • you really are an amazingly beautiful woman, Heather – pregnant, not, everything. You’re stunning.

  • Anonymous says:

    You look absolutly amazing!

    I think you do a great job with the self photos!

    Beautiful!!!!

  • fallingwthu says:

    Actually, the more kids you have the faster you drop. At least with me that’s true. I dropped at 34 weeks with my 3rd child, but went until 39.3 the pain was so fucking intense, her head rubbed against my pelvis bone, for the remainder 5 weeks or so. So Fucking unbelievable. I wanted to die. I remember when June ended and I still had 4 weeks to go only to walk to the doctors every week until her birth. With hauling 2 freaking bored kids (who fight like two cats in a sack) and the heat, omg the heat. Last summer was dreadful.

    Yes, you’ve dropped, and she is low, I hope you don’t experience the same with her head rubbing against the pelvis.

    To add: also my god my baby was super long, 21.5 inches long, the longest baby I ever had. So she always had her knees crossed in my upper right ribs. HURT like fuck!

    • admin says:

      Xan didn’t engage until literally when I started pushing! He dropped, sort of, just at the very end but it was subtle and gradual. With Tempest I dropped at 36 weeks, and with Jericho I never dropped. He was very low from the get-go.

      Since Fuzzbaby has dropped I’m getting the strangest nerve pain. I think I have a pinched nerve in my spine that is somehow related to my colon because every so often my hip will slip out of socket and it feels like a serrated knife jabs up into my anus. She can also create the same sensation by moving her hands in front of her face into my rectum. She was never able to do that before she dropped… and holy FUCK does it ever hurt.

      Long babies: YES – I’m positive she’s quite long. Tempest was as long as yours was and she was just… so spindly! All knees and elbows. Fuzz often has her knees crossed up under my ribs too. Ow ow ow.

      • fallingwthu says:

        I forgot to comment on the photos, but as usual they are beautiful, even if you feel weird…they are one of your best.

        I hope you do go early (your early as in on time) vs being over due. I bet you want that wee one to hold and let her nuzzle your breast right now.

        good vibes to you for your HD to go away, I didn’t have that, but had Gerd during the last 20 weeks of my pregnancy. That wasn’t fun to wake up almost every night 3 or more times in a night with acid in my throat/mouth

  • real_bethy says:

    I think you are beautiful. I love all your pictures, especially the ones of you. πŸ™‚

  • Anonymous says:

    amazing

    most beautiful pregnant woman I have seen and I photograph them all the time, best of luck with this little one… and thank you so much for your writing…. you have made me be more real.
    kelly
    kellybennettphotography@yahoo.com

  • keilababe says:

    I’ve always thought that the distinctive shape of your face was part of what makes your look so different, and therefore attractive. It goes well with long and short hairdos.

    I love, love the belly shots. I have no idea how you always manage to pull off “hugely pregnant” as damn sexy. LOL. I don’t think I could even get “remotely cute” as a pregnant lady.

    I was wondering if you were going to be able to do a maternity shoot with all this throwing up misery you have going on. I’m sure it will be awesome!

    The last shot would be an awesome magazine cover!

  • bazo0ka says:

    You look like Jessica Rabbit in the one with your hand cut out! I’m SO jealous of your gorgeous belly, green with envy! You look amazing and so incredibly beautiful <3 <3

  • crunchynurse says:

    Great pics!

    I think your photos are beautiful, but I know we are all our own worst critics, so I can understand how you feel. I absolutely hate almost every photo taken of me since I was 25.

    • admin says:

      Re: Great pics!

      I think part of the problem is that all my photos from age 14 to present look pretty much the same, face wise.

      • crunchynurse says:

        Re: Great pics!

        My face is exactly what I don’t like in my photos, because of the changes. That, and the curvature of my upper spine if a profile shot is taken. Both those things make me feel old, and I’m only 38.

        • admin says:

          Re: Great pics!

          It’s funny because my problem is the exact opposite: I loathe the youthful look because I haven’t changed at all from teenagehood. When I smile really big you can see crows feet and laugh lines, but you can’t see them normally so there’s really no indicator of my actual age.

          I get the feeling old though… with chronic pain from arthritis and spinal fusions keeping me down in bed for good chunks of every single day it’s hard not to feel like an old fucking lady sometimes. :-/ I’ve been advised, numerous times, to get a cane to improve my mobility and I keep not doing it because honestly I’m feeling too vain/self-conscious about appearing in public with it. I often walk with a limp, or dragging my right side, and that’s bad enough.

          • crunchynurse says:

            Re: Great pics!

            Too bad we can’t swap parts. LOL I’d gladly give you a few inches of height too. Hard to find women’s pants with a 34 inch (preferably 36) inseam.

            Seriously though, so sorry your pain and mobility issues are so severe. πŸ™

            • Anonymous says:

              Re: Great pics!

              Hollister clothing stores have that long of inseam. if you search a bit you can find the basic colors without any fading or fraying. just regular jeans. totally affordable too.

      • erinmdmd says:

        Re: Great pics!

        Maybe its just that you tend to wear makeup more now, but I think you’ve aged a bit (not in a bad way- I see the same in myself and we’re around the same age).

        • admin says:

          Re: Great pics!

          For some reason I thought you were at least 4-5 years younger than I was… Maybe it’s just the ages of our kids. πŸ˜›

          I do wear more makeup now. I’ve gotten way more into it in the last few years and I honestly really, really love it. If I had the money to invest in it, I would *adore* doing makeup as a hobby… just for the sake of fun.

          • erinmdmd says:

            Re: Great pics!

            Nope, I’ll be 28 the week Riana turns 5 and peter turns 2. Funny- I’m like crazy super young to have a five year old here! Most parents are 10-15 years older than me with kids Raina’s age.

  • Did you dye your hair? It looks way blonder in these pictures and I LOVE IT! It looks AMAZING on you … but then I went back to look at the others cause I couldn’t tell if you colored it or if it was the lighting hahah. Either way, you look SO gorgeous. Like a freaking earth goddess.

    • admin says:

      I did dye it. I keep my hair strawberry blonde/light red by using blonde dyes without bleach, as for some reason that turns my hair red. The blonder I buy, the redder it gets. If I use red dye, it goes purple or magenta. ALWAYS.

      Anyway. I tried this new brand I’ve never used before because it was on sale for $5… and it ended up COMPLETELY UNEVEN. I was so horrified as it was drying, it just looked like random chunks of blonde and light red mixed with my old colour. I don’t understand it. I’ve been dying my hair since I was 13 and have NEVER EVER had this happen. Never. The coverage was perfect and the mix was fine, I don’t understand it!

      Regardless, when it dried it thankfully didn’t look like shit. It sort of looks like I gave myself highlights, and they actually managed to look intentional… I’ve had tons of compliments on it, so I really dodged a bullet. But I probably won’t use that brand again.
      I do like the colour though. It went much blonder than I’m used to.

      • Anonymous says:

        My hair does this if I try to dye it blonde, which I haven’t in years. If I go for a dirty blonde it comes out strawberry blonde & if I go for bright blonde I look like Lucy lol. I think it’s because I have alot of red tones in my hair, it was more red when I was little but the when I started dyeing it brown it just stayed brown. Now the red is almost unnoticeable in the dark brownness unless I get alot of sun or swim in a (chlorine) pool.
        But I sooo have the red head complexion, I’m the palest brunette EVER.

        • admin says:

          I’m naturally so dark brown it’s almost black, as seen here. It’s actually kind of weird to look at images of myself with my natural colour because I have only twice let it grow out since I was 13… I’ve been red or blonde the rest of the time. O_o

          When I’ve had my hair professionally bleached I’m told my ‘core colour’ is a bright red. Not entirely sure what that means, but I assume it’s what you’re describing.

  • jenrose1 says:

    As an avid fan of RuPaul’s drag race, I can tell you those queens have NOTHING on you for sheer feminine pretty.

    They WISH they could have your face and body.

    If I do in fact manage to be knocked up this month, I’d be due Christmas. You all were coming down to see us, no?

    • admin says:

      Hahaha, thank you.

      And – yes! We’re doing the drive in mid December, probably. And if you’re still offering we’d love to come by and hang for a night.

      • jenrose1 says:

        According to FF, if I did manage it, I’ll actually be due Dec. 25, which kind of cracks me up. So if you’re there in mid December, I’d be… erm… 38 weeks ish… All assuming our heroic efforts bear fruit.

        • admin says:

          If that works out, I will totally take pictures for you as payment for your generous offer to let us be annoying at your house. πŸ™‚

          • jenrose1 says:

            Hee! I strongly suspect that Xan and Shiny will either get on like gangbusters or completely butt heads. They’ve both got a certain “crazy” about them, and I can totally see Xan spending the entire visit cracking Shiny up. Tempest and Laura* will become best buds, and if Kailea’s around, she’ll glom onto your newbaby…lol! Seriously, I suspect it will be a blast. Oh, and Curtis and my sister will disappear into the kitchen and a feast will be had, leaving you and me to hang out and have fun, no?

            *the alternative here is that Laura will completely overwhelm Tempest by asking her a nonstop stream of questions. But if Tempest reads to Laura, she will have a fan for life.

            • admin says:

              Awesome.

              Also? Anyone who can keep up with Tempest’s blue streak would be her instant BFF. I have never, ever seen Tempest overwhelmed by a kid before (with the exception of Xan, of course). I don’t even think it’s possible.

              • jenrose1 says:

                Anytime anyone brings kids over, Laura is constantly, “Where did so and so go?” for days after. She LOVES new people. Especially ones who don’t try to sit on her the way Shiny does.

  • The last one especially is stunning!

  • I..erb…homina!

    That’s about all I can get out that makes sense. You are stunning.

  • mybonnykate says:

    Ohhhhhh the last one is gorgeous. So silvery.

  • uneko says:

    Angel… if you feel like your pictures of you look like you’re trying to be sexy, when you’re not at all trying to be sexy…. it’s because YOU’RE SEXY. and there’s nothing wrong with that. these a beautiful pictures. No shame in that.

    Also? no. you’re very feminine. nothing masculine about you. πŸ™‚

  • 1. your makeup looks awesome! All these pictures are rad.

    2. there’s something about this photo…

    http://www.natural-forces.com/images/maternity/babybelly4/b434-13.jpg

    … that’s very, “God is spreading the clouds and sending angels out of your vagina.” Or something. lol.

  • desert_fox says:

    Gorgeous! I wish you the best! πŸ™‚

  • mammaopal says:

    Heather, you look SO beautiful. I agree with the other poster who said your face is without flaws.
    I understand though, because I have the same worries about myself. All the photos I like of myself don’t look like me at all. That’s why I like them! I used to HATE my smile as a kid, and tried not to smile for photos. I thought my face “caved in” when I smiled, and didn’t stay smooth like the rest of my friends. Turns out, I have massive dimples, and people think that’s endearing. I hated it though, and I still have issues about my unusual look when I see photos of myself.

    Your pregnant body is stunning. Just stunning.

    I know what you mean about the HG weight issue, and the heartburn/nausea/heartburn as well. I puked in my sleep and aspirated it once. OUCH. It burned alll day long. It was hell. I would also get these wierd hiccup/burp/acid refux attacks all the time that would result in my inhaling my stomach acid. Not. Fun.
    The cure turned out to be chewing on raw, unsalted almonds. I literally slept with a bag of them next to my pillow, and every time I woke up, I would chew about 5 of them. They also aren’t so bad the second time around, so I didn’t get sick of them. I wish I’d known that earlier, because even the proton-pump inhibitor wasn’t helping.

    It’s a strange feeling to be worried about losing weight when you’re pregnant when most woman worry about gaining too much. It was especially strange since I was overweight to begin with. The day after I had Yoko, I was 10 pounds lighter than I was before I had her, which was a total success. Much better than the 30 pounds I lost with my son.

    • devilgrrl says:

      It is weird worrying about not gaining enough weight. Even with fairly well controlled HG, I still weighed less than I did prepregnancy. My doctor was constantly nagging me about not gaining enough.

      I love Tempest’s pink tips. They’re awesome.

      • admin says:

        Tempest has a special love of pink hair. She wants all over pink, but I’m hesitant because I LOVE THE RED TOO MUCH. So we compromised with half and half, or large chunks and streaks. That was the very last of her jar of manic panic flamingo pink and the store is sold out, so next time it gets some in may be when she goes full on. She practically shakes with excitement when I mention it.

    • admin says:

      Unsalted almonds. Got it.

      I’ve been taking an antacid almost every night, but it stopped working. I have a script of rep… repr.. something. An anti-GERD med. It’s class B so I was going to start taking it daily because the GERD attacks I’ve had lately are so intensely painful I really cannot deal with them.

      • mammaopal says:

        RAW unsalted Almonds. If they’re roasted, it won’t work. πŸ˜‰

        What is with us and our face hate?! I LOVE the way your lips look in that picture. Seriously Heather, people get SURGERY to have lips that look like that. Surgery.

        I want you to take pictures of my family one day. I’m hoping the next time we make it to the island, it will be because we’re rich and can afford the ferry. Which will also mean we’ll have extra money for a photo shoot I bet!!! It’ll all in The Plan. Bwahahaha!!!

        • admin says:

          Would LOVE to take pictures of your beautiful family. πŸ™‚

          As a kid I hated my lips so, so much. I’ve gotten happier with them as I got older, and it’s not the fat lips that I hate so much, it’s the creases they make in my face.
          When I was younger I used to walk around with my lips pulled in and bitten because this kid across the street from me would tease me as I walked home from school and call me “Monkey lips”. It took me YEARS to be relatively okay with having big lips.

          Curtis has really chubby lips and I love them SO FUCKING MUCH. He has this little cleft in his bottom lip because it’s so plump it creases… and oh, it makes me crazy. I love it.

      • jenrose1 says:

        Cashews work for that trick too, and yeah, they MUST be raw.

      • starpolish says:

        Is the GERD medication Reglan? That’s the brand name of a med I took here in the US for some severe stomach issues (not HG, but I my acid reflux was out of control and even drinking water led to pain so bad I couldn’t walk). If it is, be aware that it works really well but some of the side effects are awful. It instigated severe suicidal ideation and I almost threw myself out of a window, along with some tardive dyskenesia. Whee.

        • admin says:

          That is… odd. Given that it’s a heartburn medication it shouldn’t be possible for it to cause psychotic breaks. That’s kind of like taking Pepto Bismol and getting that side effect. O_o
          On further searching it seems it has a number of depressive related side effects. How bizarre. I guess it works completely differently than I’d thought… no wonder moms try to avoid it. I’ve never taken it before so I don’t know much about it except as a half-assed alternative to domperidone for increase in milk supply.

          Regardless, that isn’t the drug I have here. It’s one often given to ulcer patients, and I’ve been on and off it for years. So has Curtis, actually. Raperazole.

    • admin says:

      PS on face caving in. I’ve always hated the fact that when I smile big, my lip folds under my nose. It’s like my mouth is too big for my face, so it sort of folds in all over itself. I HATE that crease. Whenever it shows up in photos I immediately trash it. Ugghhhhh. You can kind of see a hint of it in the third maternity pic down (past the cut, not counting the face shot).

    • Yes, it is a strange feeling.

      I started off my last pregnancy about 10-15lbs overweight. I didn’t have HG, but dropped a bunch in the first trimester, continued to have a pretty low appetite through much of pregnancy, and ended up gaining 0-5lbs over my prepregnancy weight.

      Now, it’s less than 6 months out from the birth, and I’ve dropped about 30lbs from my highest weight during pregnancy, and well within my ideal weight range – possibly the lowest I’ve been since I reached my full height.

      Can’t quite decide how I feel about this. On one hand, it just doesn’t seem right. On the other, I’m not feeling particularly unhealthy or low energy… but I’m really not getting much exercise, either.

  • timmytm says:

    You’ve been eating your wheaties.

  • ha, unintentionally super HAWT lady with a baby! you look wonderful, like some poster girl for married with children and sexy, strong and capable. but *i* have blue hair (:

  • lilmoe says:

    Wow, I hope you don’t end up deleting any because think your pictures are beautiful, seriously!

  • effervescent says:

    You are beautiful! Love seeing the pictures, and the kids are lovely.

  • twobadmice says:

    I LOVE the last one. Beautiful shot. beautiful woman. beautiful belly.

  • gngr says:

    Because you prefaced (no pun intended) your photos by mentioning your face, I was drawn to that in the photos, almost subconsciously looking for anything to be negative about. I personally found nothing. In a few of these, the way your hair rests, it made me think very strongly of a 1940s pinup girl. In the rest, you are as a model. Very feminine. Very strong. Very natural, and very comfortable. So there. πŸ™‚

    • gngr says:

      Had any inkling of what her name is yet? I know you won’t share it, but I am curious. πŸ™‚

      • admin says:

        Yes and no. We both had the same name just sort of come to us very early in pregnancy, which is very obviously girl (which is why we got the sex assessment ultrasound) but neither of us feel comfortable even really talking about it aloud until we meet her. It feels really wrong to say, “This is probably her name” or whatnot. So, we have 70% of a name but won’t commit to anything. We’re much more stuck on middle names. It’s down to two, which are completely different personalities, so she may go middlenameless until she’s 1-2 weeks old unless her character is pretty obvious at birth.

  • thehobbit says:

    1. That bra is excellent? Who makes it? Yes I know you have the gigunda boobs. Don’t tell anyone, me too. >.>

    2. I love your photos. I’m hoping I can convince my friend PJ to take some of me before this is all over. I think she’s one of the few people I’d feel really comfortable getting down and naked with. Sure, sure, I could take preggo photos with clothes on, but I didn’t get this way wearing clothes, why celebrate it by wearing clothes?

Leave a Reply