Two mornings ago I woke up at 6am with some of the worst nausea I’ve experienced in this pregnancy, and a horrible GERD attack on top of it. It was so awful I was crying; kneeling on the freezing bathroom floor, begging some unseen force to strike me down where I lay and put me out of my misery. It wasn’t so much that the throwing up was exceptionally disgusting or intense, it was that the nausea itself was so extreme and so earth-shatteringly miserable that it actually drove me to tears. I hope to never experience that kind of nausea again. The dizziness had my head spinning so hard I kept briefly passing out with my face hanging into the toilet, then regaining consciousness just long enough to heave a few more times before blacking out again… or was I merely sleeping? I couldn’t tell; it all seemed to blur together. It was an awful way to spend the first hour of the day.

Some time later as the nausea began to stabilize and I had a few moments between each attack, I used my free time to plod about the house with a steel bowl in my hands, hoping to somehow ‘walk it off’ (but not so confident hat I was willing to leave my precious vomit bowl behind). I tried to keep my mind on something other than how miserable I felt, and noted that the morning light filtering through the kids’ bedroom window looked oddly tinted. I curiously made my way to the livingroom to investigate the sunrise through our main windows, only to find everything covered in a blanket of fresh snow. In the four hours I’d been asleep that night, we’d somehow managed to accumulate nearly a foot, and it was still coming down.

Snow? It’s almost March! What the hell is snow doing here? I figured it was a fluke; that it would melt away by 10am, but it ended up sticking around. The clouds continued to unleash the freak blizzard until later in the evening, and even then the temperature didn’t go up far enough to melt it into slush. As of this writing, nearly three days from the time it began, we still have a few inches outside. This is absolutely unheard of in our climate at this time of year; if we get snow at all we usually have it in late December or more likely January (January/February are usually the coldest months, sometimes even December is still crisp enough to be a part of September’s introduction to autumn).

Naturally the first thing that happened was a closure of half the schools in the district due to the city only having one or two functional plows; plows they almost never send out on time, or on the residential streets. Xan’s preschool was cancelled, but Tempest’s school remained open, and since we live only a block and change from it she happily walked to class and refused our offer to let her stay home, or attempt to dig the car out and drive her.
In the late afternoon the kids enjoyed mucking about in the front yard; throwing snowballs at the livingroom window while I sat safely inside knitting, or experimenting with the fragility of frozen plastic toys – but what they really wanted was to complete the snow day experience and go sledding somewhere. We have a college campus near our home with a few small hills in the front that are perfect for tobogganing, so we bundled the kids in several layers of clothing and winter accessories and brought them to the campus with our seldom-used Krazy Karpet.

The wind picked up just as we got there, giving the air a mean bite that very quickly cleared the area of fellow sledders – though we decided to stay in spite of the warning.
I can’t participate with the kids this far into pregnancy, not without a lot of effort and discomfort anyway, so instead I decided to bring my camera and try to take some photos of the kids enjoying themselves. It’s been forever since I’ve picked it up and gone out of my way to take photos of our family, or even of the environment around me… I’ve felt rather put out both by the miserable experience of this pregnancy and by the overwhelming business debt: a combination that’s left me devoid of any creativity, inspiration or motivation to even take photos of my own children. The last few months have netted about three photos of each one, and even those are half-assed and barely worth saving. It bothers me, but motivation can’t be forced; any attempts to do so only results in further creative rebellion. That day wasn’t exceptionally different, but at least I walked away with a few recent images of the kids so I can pretend I’m actually a photographer parent again.
I regularly read the blogs of other, highly successful, photographers who take photographs of their children and their environment on a daily basis that seem to be effortlessly flawless and inspirational. They could take a picture of a glass of water and call it art. I don’t understand how it comes so easily, and I wish that I had a fraction of that kind of natural talent. I’m having such a hard time with my art right now; it’s causing me to lose my faith in photography as a whole. I hang onto the shred of hope that this too, shall pass – but it gets more and more difficult as time goes on without any real change in how I’m feeling. I hope, at least, that by the time this baby is born I’ll have some of my spark back so I can truly enjoy recording those precious first weeks in a way I have never had the opportunity to before… I can’t waste that time with self-pity and ennui, I just can’t.

With that context in mind, it made me feel very content to look through the photos after we arrived back home, and realize that I actually liked quite a few of them. I want to keep taking photos that make me feel that way. I know it’s in me somewhere, I just need to find the motivation to carry my camera with me and take it out, line up all the blocks and actually go out and look for it. Life just feels so exhausting right now that I don’t want to do it – and I have every excuse not to – but the more I give in the further it gets from me.

The snow took us completely by surprise considering the week before looked like this:


With coolish spring temperatures, budding purple flowers dotting the sides of our home and birds chirping as they gathered twigs for new nests in preparation for a full bloom of spring. Groundhog day told us winter was over, which seems to be a rare outcome for that tradition, and we were celebrating with more time spent outdoors riding bikes and going for walks.

… and then out of nowhere it dropped to -5 and snowed for two continuous days.

It was already getting into the evening when we arrived for sledding, and the sun was starting to set through the skeletal trees. The rose-coloured dusk illuminates the thin layer of ice and powder resting atop the fresh snow, giving it an iridescent glow that is mesmerizing… and can’t possibly be accurately captured in a photo.

We found a particularly steep hill with snow that had been pushed flat by sledders before us, giving it a nice icy slick that was perfect for Krazy Karpets. Curtis went down with Xan and held onto him instead of the handles, hoping to prevent him from falling off. That turned out to be rather foolish… as it went fast enough to send them both spiraling sideways and backwards. Xan was fine but Curtis ended up flying off the sled and skidding to a stop on his back; packing his pants with ice as he went.

Tempest looks on as they take to the hill, ensuring it’s safe before she gives it a try.

A close-up of this image reveals pure terror on Xan’s face.

Though in the end, I think he liked it.

Growing impatient with Xan taking extra turns, Tempest invents her own toboggan: she finds a bunny hill with a sled track and bravely throws herself onto it.

After living in the Mojave all his life, Curtis is still a bit of a wuss when it comes to the cold. He tends to overcompensate with three to five layers of clothing and accessories underneath the largest down coat he could find; it ends up adding an extra two feet to his girth. I told him he looks ridiculous, but he insists it’s necessary.

Tempest is much more tolerant to the low temperatures, even in spite of the bitter wind that afternoon.

We didn’t stay long; the wind became too much for us to handle and even the other scragglers that had held on through it were also starting to give up and go home for hot drinks.
As we walked back to the car the last rays of sunlight faded over the hill. The wind kicked up again, blowing the top layer of fine powder off the drifts beneath the trees; it was lovely. Even the kids stopped to watch it for a few minutes.

After a brief adventure when our car spent a good ten minutes spinning out in the snow drift Curtis had parked in, we made it home and served hot cocoa for the kids to tide them over until dinner. Xan had swimming lessons in an hour, so he insisted on having his hair in pigtails so it wouldn’t be in his face.

It occurred to us recently that his sudden love of pink, pigtails and all things generally reserved for girls is not so much about simple curiosity or budding transgender identity, but rather because he so enjoys the reaction he gets from others when he does it. Even at four, boys and girls have a pretty firm idea of what our culture views as gender male and gender female: colours, clothing, toys, even characters on television shows. No matter how carefully you raise your children, these influences still get to them: it’s just the world we live in.
In the last year or so, most of the boys Xan’s age have begun attaching themselves to gendered behavior or stereotyping: rough and tumble, cars, destruction and action… and most especially the colour blue. Everything must be as boyish as possible, and very few will still venture curiously into the “girl stuff” at 4 or 5 years old. And those that do generally stop once the peer pressure begins. Xan seems to be an exception to this rule in more ways than one: he has taken to genderbending for fun.

At first it was just at home: he’d dress up in Tempest’s clothes, ask for make-up and “girl hair” not simply for the experience of dress up, but specifically to “be a girl” so he could come out and tell us as though it was the most hilarious joke that he’d brilliantly invented. It doesn’t have the same vibe to it as early gender play in gay boys, (and to be honest it’s Tempest that gives us that impression: I’d be shocked if she grew up to be straight), it felt more like he was acting and conspiring for the sake of comedy.
The other boys in Xan’s preschool have begun reacting to his choice of coat: Tempest’s pink hand-me-down. They seem either confused or distressed by it, whereas the girls think very little of his fashion choice other than an opportunity to have something in common with a member of the opposite sex (somewhat of a rarity at that age). The more attention he receives over his clothing choices, the more he gleefully plots to create more tension and controversy. He quickly picked up on the idea that boys “shouldn’t” wear pink; certainly not from us, but from his peers and the general population around him… and instead of being deterred or confused by it, he’s encouraged. It isn’t about pride or desire, it’s entirely about the reactions he receives to his one man genderbending show.
Everywhere we go now, people refer to him as “she”. We stopped correcting them and instead just quietly wait to see what Xan does in response. He listens carefully to every conversation between us and other adults to see if they’ve said it, and each time he hears it he grins, laughs and encourages more from his audience: “I’m so pretty!” he’ll announce, tugging on his pigtails. Or, “You said SHE! I’m a GIRL!” as he collapses in a fit of giggles.

His behavior tends to elicit one of two extreme reactions: either shock and disgust at us as parents for allowing (or worse: encouraging) his genderbending, or amusement that he seems to take what is otherwise a serious issue for kids his age so lightly.
A few days ago someone approached Xan in a yarn store with Curtis, and after an unpleasant (and unrelated) exchange Curtis said very clearly, “He is just fine”. The woman who had previously been in lecture mode stopped abruptly to clarify: “He?”
“Yes, he’s a boy.”
“But … he’s wearing pink!” She seemed very seriously distressed by this.
Curtis countered, “Is there a rule that says boys can’t wear pink?”
“Well, no,” she admitted, “But it’s very confusing for me!”
“Oh well.” At this point Curtis took Xan’s hand and walked away, and even in the midst of a confrontation that was clearly causing tension for his parent, Xan was grinning away at the notion that he’d once again been mistaken for a girl and been told he shouldn’t be wearing girlish things.

He’s always been a one-man show: always entertaining, always “on”, telling jokes, singing songs, chattering away like a little squirrel all day long. As much as it drives us crazy, it is clear that he has a natural shine for creating a stage… and the more controversy he can create, the more boundaries he can push, the better. He strikes me as the kind of person who will grow up straight, but will dress in drag and do shows for fun merely because it’s hilariously inappropriate. We need to get him in acting and theatre as soon as he’s old enough to join a troupe; he’s certainly the right kind of person for it.

The behavior is also netting him more and more attention from little girls his age. On Valentine’s day he received, by far, the most cards in his little cubby. Many with personalized little love notes written on them. When he came home that afternoon he smugly walked into the bedroom and dumped them all on my bed.
“You know what I think? I think everybody loves me,” he told me.


More winter knitting, and knitting for Fuzzbaby:
Lately I’ve been really enjoying knitting again, so I’m taking advantage of that by spending a little of each day working on new projects. I leap from one to the other: as soon as I finish one I pick up a new set of needles and start on something else. It keeps me busy, it keeps my hands occupied, and I can feel productive even on my worst days. Crafting is very rewarding that way.

First off, the finished winter booties. I posted this picture in the last entry:

… taken before I’d felted them. I sent them through a cycle in the wash, and they came out rather uneven: one was perfect, but the other was at least 5cm too large. I sent that one through a second time, but nothing changed. They still looked very disproportionate to what a baby’s foot, and I was worried they were a complete failure… which sucks because I worked hard on that pattern with those teeny tiny double-pointed needles.

I blocked them for a day and a half and then stuffed them lightly with some polyfill to get a better idea of what they’d look like when worn, and was pleasantly surprised to find they were actually very nice. When flattened, their appearance is quite deceiving.
I ended up breaking out my snap press (which hasn’t seen the light of day in years) instead of opting for velcro like the pattern suggested. I hate velcro. Plus, velcro and wool do not mix well… especially felted wool, or wool that tends to pill easily (as the SWS brand does). I thought it turned out rather nicely. Plus, the snaps give the booties a lot more adjustability: I can snap up the bottom row on the tightest setting and the top one on the loosest for a baby with big cankles, or vise-versa for a baby with fat feet and skinnier legs.

I figured I should also make some sort of matching hat, so I chose the “Aviatrix” pattern that’s been sitting in my [ Ravelry ] queue for a while. That also turned out well, but not nearly as nicely as the booties. 95% of the hat is done in short rows, so it’s good practice for those who need it. I can never seem to pick them up right, no matter which technique or tutorial I try… so mine always have these little bumps in them. Oh well. I assume it’ll fade with wear.

I <3 the buttons I found for the hat: they match it perfectly.

I tried it on the only doll we have in the house, but its head is much too small to fit something sized for a 3-6 month old.

Plus, sideways it sort of looks like a Star Wars alien…

Links of the Day:
Gm suicides – Another reason not to support GM foods.
How to make oatmeal… wrong – How McDonald’s oatmeal product has pulled a fast one to make us all believe it’s healthy, when in fact it has almost as many calories as their burgers.
Movie sounds guy – A short video about the unsung hero of movies: the manual foley guy. I’ve always been fascinated by foley artists, so this is like crack to me.
Sex ed – Author Julia Sweeney reads an absolutely hilarious monologue about her first sex ed conversation with her eight year old daughter, Mulan. Curtis and I laughed so hard we cried.

Comments

comments

25 Comments

  • quietseeker says:

    Just remember that in one of Sally Mann’s best-known photos, it took a long time to successfully make the photo and she had to have someone behind her daughter, out of the frame, hitting the water to make it ripple.

  • Anonymous says:

    “It bothers me, but motivation can’t be forced; any attempts to do so only results in further creative rebellion.”

    I’ve been feeling the same way with my lineof work! I’ve just haven’t been able to put so concisely. I’m just trusting that when my work situation changes, the passion will come back.

  • koadtoad says:

    The entire part about gender-bending Xan… when I got to the Valentine bit I laughed so hard I cried.
    Also, the booties look great!

  • The snow has been a real unexpected treat!

    Xan is such a little performer. I love that he loves to surprise people and play a role… Rylan is the same in that he does not care one bit what other people think of him. He does NOT bend to social pressure, he totally marches to his own beat (though not with gender-bending, but countless other things)… It’s been MY journey to accept and build upon what he presents me…

  • fallingwthu says:

    I knit the the same hat for my now 6 month old — perfect for the snow as it covers the ears and you don’t have to fuss with ties, just button it up.

    I love how yours shows the colorway very nicely.

    The snow didn’t fall here for two days, but we have about a foot? Maybe a bit less….

    I love that the National News covered our snow, and made it seem that we had a freakish amount. I guess winter of 96 was forgotten. I love that we have snow, but shit, that stuff can go now, I have slipped 3 times and fallen twice on my ass, thank god I’m over weight because all I did was bruise the hell out of my tailbone.

    It’s not so much the snow that bothers me it is the whipping winds, making it feel like it’s -14C with the wind chill factor. When I tried to walk my kid to school a mother was nice enough to pick the middle child up and said she’d drive her the rest way to school and for me to give her my number so she can pick the middle child up (kindergarten at her school is still 1/2 days) so that saved me another trip out.
    Good thing as well, because the bus route was re-routed and would not go past the street that our school is on.

    Xan could cross dress and be a wee little girl. LOVE that. LOL I love your booties, and I wonder where you get your snap press? Is it cheap? I would love to use snaps instead of buttons for the baby stuff I knit because the buttons never ever seem to stay buttoned up, no matter how big they are to fit the holes. (it’s like the holes stretch.

    Soy Yarn is nice isn’t it? Felts nicely.

    Anyways, I got a new lap top and I think it’s the screen, but your photos seem brighter? or less contrast than before? Maybe I’m wrong, it just doesn’t seem correct, and i know you’re a professional so you wouldn’t put out over or under exposed photos.

    I’m sorry you’re going through such a horrific time with your GERD. I had GERD with my 3rd born, and it was awful to wake up and you taste bile in your mouth/nose/throat. I didn’t throw up as nearly as much as you do with this one…but you have my empathy. I bet it must feel like it will never end. PS I have a phobia of puke myself, I fear I will die from puking that it will never end. When my eldest child had the flu, she threw up all over the walls and floor of the washroom, i couldn’t clean it up because I would vomit myself. My husband had no other choice…

    best of luck with getting through this pregnancy.

    BTW I think it’s firefox, but with your ads, I see two lines right down the page, not annoying just thought I’d tell you.

    • admin says:

      We don’t have a foot NOW but some areas of the city certainly got that much or more at the time… Sooke and Metchosin in particular always get tons more than the city proper does. After the first 24 hours we had about 10 or so inches in our yard. πŸ˜€ I mean it’s down to like… four inches now. But it’s still sticking around, and it was snowing earlier again!

      The wind: I totally agree. The cold temperatures don’t bother me so much but the wind is AWFUL. The chill makes my eyes water and my skin sting and I hate it. It makes me never want to go outside.

      Snap Press: it came from China and cost just under $200, I think? It’s been a long, long, long time since I purchased it so I don’t remember, plus the price has probably gone down in that time. I bought mine when Tempest was about 2. I also bought two die kits for the standard sized snaps (20 and 18?), but I got all my snaps from another vendor in China that sold them SUPER cheap in amazing colours. $20 could get me over two thousand in four colours.

      Brighter photos: did you switch OS? Mac and Windows have very different gamma settings, they’re off by as much as .4 in either direction. I work on a Mac. My photos aren’t blown, and my screen is calibrated for my lab and my work… but most standard screens are not (people generally don’t have much need for it unless they’re graphic designers or photographers). πŸ™‚ Sounds like you might need to calibrate yours! You can do a poor man’s calibration through Adobe settings, I think…

      • fallingwthu says:

        You know that’s what it is, my monitor isn’t calibrated right, as your photos look awesome on my old PC. I use windows 7 on the lap top and Windows XP on the old PC. It’s annoying but I will adjust it manually.

        Langford/Sooke area is in the Highlands, so yes, they would get more snow. Isn’t it weird that just Victoria got the crazy snow? Vancouver, and Seattle was missed…like we were in a bubble…

        I heard that we might get more, then it will turn into rain. But wait 5 minutes and it will be different.

        I hope you’re feeling better today.

  • azdesertrose says:

    Sorry to hear about the nausea being so bad. That’s got to suck hardcore.

    On Xan and his genderbending and comedic talents, maybe he’s the next Eddie Izzard? πŸ™‚

  • _evalution says:

    the absolute worst part of sending my oldest to preschool has been this sudden immersion in this gender stuff. my daughter is one of the only girls in her previous class who wasn’t obsessed with disney princesses and stereotypical “girl” stuff. (because i loathe disney princesses with a passion and she still has no idea who or what they are, thank god.) other parents would comment to me in half amazement at how she would play with cars, trucks, and dinosaurs. !!! apparently those are reserved for boys?

    the other day when i was getting her dressed she said to me, “i can’t wear brown! D_____ says that’s a BOY COLOR!” wtf.

    i can’t wait to see what this baby looks like. xan and tempest look so much alike, it’ll be fun to see if this baby is another mini-you.

    the baby knits are KEELING me. holy crap, those little booties?? adorable!

  • I have to disagree about the snow in late February being unheard of. I know it’s not annual, but both of the crazy, snowed-in-for-days 5-foot snowfalls we had when I was a kid (once when I was under 10 years old, not sure what year, and once when I was in middle school) were both around valentine’s day. The time in middle school, I had a friend over and she ended up snowed in at my house for FIVE days. Ugh. February is always the month I brace for snow πŸ™‚

    Those portraits of Tempest are beautiful πŸ™‚ I love the wind in her hair.

    Snap press + felted booties = GENIUS. I agree, I can’t imagine putting velcro and wool together would EVER be a great idea. They turned out so cute!

    • admin says:

      Yeah but that was when we were kids… as kids we got at least *some* snow almost every year.

      • Well those were the big huge snow-pocalypses that I can remember specific dates for… I still think snow in February has been a rather common occurrence.

        eta: I got curious and did an Environment Canada search… it seems the answer is somewhere in the middle. February comes in 3rd after January and December for snowfall (average: 14, 15, and 9 cm respectively) with the rest of the months barely making the chart. I suppose those crazy snowstorms of the past are colouring my opinion of February precipitation, though.

  • conchispa says:

    My 3-year old son is also often called a “she” and he’s not really that girly in appearance. And he does not do it as much for attention. He has a single-track mission to copy everything his big sister does. Like last night, when he had to wear a butterfly hair clip.

    I haven’t gotten any bad reactions or comments yet, but I have my wise-ass response at the ready: “oh yeah, we are raising him gay.” πŸ˜‰

    • admin says:

      M’awe!

      The gay comments and “concerns” really bother me on a deep level because it’s part of that culturally ingrained homophobia (and sexism) that makes life miserable for people. Argh. When girls dress like boys people aren’t ‘worried’, but when boys dress like girls suddenly it’s a huge deal. Wouldn’t want a boy identifying as anything less than manly, now would we?

      • Anonymous says:

        I think part of it is some of the feminisms around. Feminism for so many is about the patriarchal society, and the idea that women can be as good as men. While this has many admirable traits and comments, I think that it’s limited. It creates the vision that the things that are traditionally female (breastfeeding, stay at home moms, knitting, etc) are inherently lesser than the things that are traditionally male. The patriarchal roles in society are *better* than the female ones. I fully believe that women *can* do the same things that men can, but that doesn’t mean that they have to, or that they’re lesser for choosing not to. The mindset of traditionally female things being “lesser” is, I think, a part of why it’s so disturbing for boys to be seen as girls, but not the other way around. If a girl is acting like a boy, she’s being a feminist, she’s going to go be a CEO or an astronaut, somebody who is successful; but if a boy is acting like a girl, he’s resigning himself to a lesser form of being.

        The brand of feminism that I subscribe to sees the things that are traditionally male or female as equal, that if a man or woman chooses to do one thing or another, that it doesn’t make them lesser. A stay at home dad isn’t less than a dad that works, and a mom at work isn’t better than a mom that doesn’t–it’s their life and their circumstances, they can, need to, and should choose what’s best for them.

        Or, that’s my two cents.
        –emeeks

  • bluealoe says:

    The nausea sounds absolutely indescribably horrific. Especially the dizziness. I had a brief bout with nausea a few days ago (very rare for me), and I was utterly miserable; the thought of going through that every day is enough to make me curl up in bed and hide from the world.

    I WANT YOUR SNOW!!!! This is the first winter of my life I haven’t experienced significant snowfall, and it is messing with my brain in so many ways. We’re getting the wind, the cold weather, the disgusting snow/rain mix…and yet, no snow that stays longer than a few hours. It’s driving me crazy. So yeah, I’m jealous of your snow. (Though I do have to laugh at Curtis..0 degrees Celsius and he’s wearing a down jacket? *snort*)

    The sledding looks like fun! I especially like the first picture of Tempest going down the hill on her stomach. It captures the joy of wintry days in one moment.

    When I look at your photos, I am amazed at how effortless it seems. How you seem to capture moments of pure emotion, exactly at the right time. I realize it’s a lot of hard work that creates that shot, but from the outside, it looks like you could take a hundred of those perfect pictures without even breaking a sweat.
    I’m willing to bet that those highly successful photographers you speak of feel exactly the same way. You’re looking at their blogs and marveling at how effortless they make it seem, while behind the scenes they’re probably agonizing every step of the way. There’s probably a few who think it’s easy, but not the vast majority.

    I do know what you mean about letting the spark get farther and farther away. That’s happened to me with writing…the longer I go without writing anything the less motivated I am to start again. And as a result of that, now writing’s more of a chore than a joy, and I can’t figure out how to stop the cycle.

    Xan cracks me up. He is such a little comedian, and the genderbending amuses me to no end. I kinda wish my nephew was like that; recently he’s taken to roughhousing and action games and anything wild and destructive, and I miss the sweet little boy who played with his dollhouse and kitchen set.

    Though I can imagine it’s totally exhausting to deal with Xan being “on” all day long, every day.

    “Well, no,” she admitted, “But it’s very confusing for me!”

    Well, OF COURSE we should dress our children only in clothes that makes it easier for random strangers to tell their gender! Because making strangers happy should always be the utmost priority in raising our kids!

    Those booties are awesome. I love the color, and the hat matches perfectly. Did you use the same yarn?

    The GM suicides link was interesting….I noticed it was posted in 2008, I wonder if there’s been any update or change in the situation since then? It’s an interesting parallel to when they started introducing “improved” rice varieties to Southeast Asia (not sure if they were GM or just selectively bred). To my knowledge, they didn’t have as many problems with pests/water use/seed cost that the Indian farmers are having, and that are leading them to suicide.

    OMG, the Sex Ed talk is the most hilarious thing I’ve heard in a long time! Especially the last line…that poor mom. πŸ™‚

    • alathia says:

      that hat comparison with the star wars alien was full of win. ;_;

      i’m so sorry you are experiencing the debilitating nausea. i stopped trying to explain it to people because they just didn’t understand, throwing up didn’t help, it was just so, so bad. my vomit bowl of choice was a blue plastic bowl my husband use to use for pancakes. i remember toting it everywhere with me.

      i think you are onto something about Xan and his appreciation that pink is supposedly not for boys. samuel is 5.5 and has always loved pink. he is as rough and tumble as the next boy, but he loves to coordinate his clothes, sing to lady gaga, make up his own dance moves, and oh yeah, dress in pink. you know how hard it is to find pink stuff for little boys?! these days he just wears either a tie or a pink broach i gave him to give him his dose of pink for the day. i’ve heard him defending pink and yellow to other kids (mainly his best friend) saying that colors aren’t for boys or girls, they are for everyone. and oddly enough, samuel plays with both girls and boys equally. πŸ™‚

      • alathia says:

        i also wanted to add, i think people are dumb. samuel (and albert) often get mistaken for girls, and they have short, close cropped hair. i think people are just silly. πŸ˜›

        • fallingwthu says:

          I have a niece who freaks out when her son picks pink to wear. Well, at school recently we had Pink shirt day…against bullying. All the boys had pink on but one boy who refused to wear it (he wore his Canucks hockey jersey.) And the teacher asked him to wear just one pink silly band and he refused. I don’t dare say this to the mom and dad, but they’re the ones drilling in him that pink is a girlie color and it’s not allowed on boys. Period!

          What drives me nuts is how girls can joy boy scouts, and boys cannot join girl scouts/guides. Moms can be Boy scout leaders, but men cannot be girl scout leaders. It’s just so backwards. Like others here have said, its fine for a girl to cross dress in boy clothing, but if a boy does it it’s just wrong.

          • admin says:

            That’s a reflection of how strong sexism still is today. Women and girls are inherently lesser, so while it’s okay for a woman to “play” at being manly, a man playing at being a girl is considered a huge step down; embarrassing, emasculating, etc.

    • admin says:

      In response to your comment: several sincere “Thank you”s. Yes I used the same yarn, it’s the soy wool that I found a huge bag of some time ago so I’m gradually using it up. We showed the sex ed talk thing to mom and she found it hilarious too! I love how you as the listener can recognize as the mom slowly gets her head deeper and deeper underwater and you just KNOW what’s coming.

  • OMFG. Xan. Too funny, I just can’t take it… am seriously LOLing. Xan, the wee ladies’ man! One day, all the other boys will be jealous, wondering why all the girls flock to him. πŸ˜€

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